Befriending the mind

This year I’m learning to use my alone time more wisely, to give myself the means for introspection and creativity. My imagination runs freely in the realm of my dreams and I seldom give myself the opportunity to do this while in a conscious state. When I have sat with my thoughts, I’ve been afraid of what feelings they may evoke within me. But sometimes all we need to do is acknowledge them, to surrender entirely to the secret world of our minds and be okay with unoccupied moments. So instead of running or distracting myself, I’m simply going to let things be.

The relationship each of us has with ourselves will always be the most important one, above all others. I’ve flaunted my busyness like a badge of honour throughout the years, and I’ve become so accustomed to having a full schedule that I’ve lost my ability to self-soothe in quiet moments. Even though I have an incredible support network, I don’t want to be dependent on others to find my inner peace when my thoughts run wild. I want to be better at dealing with difficult emotions and so, I’m going to start having conversations with myself, holding space and showing the same compassion and empathy as I would to any of my loved ones. Eventually you realise they’re just feelings, and they can only hurt you as much as you allow them to.

I want to approach dating with the same curiosity that I had a year ago. Speaking to the people I have, it is evident that many have been burned by their experiences and this unknowingly seeps into the next. It’s a self-perpetuating cycle that I would like to navigate carefully myself, because it is unfair to project your hurt onto others. Even so, I’m perfectly content on my own and will only choose to be with someone who adds to my life. I am proud of the person I’ve become and I have so much love around me. It would be silly to settle for anything less than what it is I am looking for in a partner, even if those standards seem high. I really do believe my soulmate is out there somewhere, waiting to be found.

I can only control what is within my control so that’s what I’ll focus on. It will happen for me exactly when it is meant to, and I trust the universe is there to guide me along the way. Life isn’t designed to be easy all the time and I accept the good, the bad and the inbetween.